2 Weeks and a Few Days

I can't believe Sophie and Beckett are almost 3 weeks old. Last week (18-25th) Beckett worked on nursing and coming off of oxygen. It took 2 days for him to get it down he kept falling asleep, apparently it is a lot of work to eat :) After that the doctors bumped up his feedings every day, so by Saturday I was at the hospital every 3 hours to feed him. They also tried him off of the oxygen again on Saturday. By Sunday (the 24th) he was ready to come home, breathing and eating on his own. We were worried he would have to come home with oxygen which would be scary. His first few nights home I forgot how hard newborns are in the middle of the night. (I like my sleep) Now he is doing pretty good, he definitely eats more then every 3 hours like he did in the hospital, but I think we will keep him. He loves to be held and he loves to tuck into a little ball.

Sophie has had some battles of her own. I have had numerous nurses tell me how shocked they are that Beckett did better then Sophie because girls tend to do better then boys. Last week she got taken off of the ventilator and put on a high flow oxygen. They started her at 5 liters per hour and had to bump her up to 7 because she started to show signs of a clasped lung. After a couple days they started to take her liters down each day. By Sunday she was off oxygen and air completely. So Sunday night they let me try to feed her. At the Provo hospital they weigh the baby before and after they eat to see how much they ate. A full feeding for Sophie is 47ml. The first night she did 23 ml. I thought to myself great she will be home in a couple days. Well Sophie had other plans. Monday she didn't eat, she would sit there and stare and me and wonder what I wanted her to do. The Doctor wanted me to come 3 times a day and try with her. Tuesday it was the same thing, she would just sit there, maybe suck 2 times but that was it. I was starting to get frustrated with myself for not being able to get her to latch on and stay on. Tuesday night I had a nurse sit in and watch me feed her, she told me she was grading my nursing (that freaked me out). On Wednesday they had the lactation specialist come in. Now that was awkward, don't get me wrong it was nice to have her help, but nursing is a private personal thing and having someone sit there and watch and grab your boob is a little uncomfortable. She gave me a few pointers on what we could do. Also during this week I have had multiple doctors and nurses tell me I could get Sophie home sooner if I just bottle feed her. Well I don't want to do this cause I wanted her to eat from me, not have to pump to eat. (I am not a cow and don't want to nurse all day everyday) By Wednesday night I was ready to give up, it was emotionally draining and physically draining. I was driving to Provo 3 times a day to have Sophie sit and stare at me. Great for bonding and I was happy to see her but I wanted her to make progress. On Thursday I did what the lactation specialist told me to to do and Sophie did a little better. Thursday night she did 15 of her 47ml. Friday morning (this morning) she did 28 of her 47ml. It has been a long and slow process and I hope she continues to do well. (I think she likes the mommy Sophie time). She is doing everything she needs to do all she has to do is eat and she can come home. I am hoping that by this time next week she will be home :)

Sorry this was probably boring but now I have record of what happened. Here are some pictures to make up for it.

Sophie Rae

Almost Ready to come home

Cute big brother

No more oxygen

Ready to go home

1 Week

It is hard to believe that our babies are 1 week old. It has been a crazy week to say the least. Tuesday morning I finally got to hold Beckett, it was so nice to hold him. On Wednesday they gave me permission to go and see Sophie at Utah Valley. It was so great to finally get to see her. It was hard to see her with so many cords and things hooked to her. She was put on a ventilator so any time she cried she couldn't make noise, you could only tell by her face and heart rate that she was crying. It broke my heart to see her cry. Brad also took me down to see her on Thursday too. Beckett was off of his IV and up to full feedings by Thursday so Friday I got to try non nutritive feedings. I left the hospital Friday afternoon, it was really hard to leave my baby. On Saturday I got to try a nutritive feeding with Beckett and he did great. Sophie however was having a hard time digesting my milk (it is really fattening). The nurses in both hospitals are very impressed with my milk supply and call me the "Dairy Queen".

Since I have been home from the hospital I go to try to feed Beckett twice a day. After the second feeding Brad and I make a trip down to see Sophie. I am so happy they are both making progress.

Sunday Sophie was taken off the ventilator and put on a high flow nasal prong. She was having some problems at first but they have found the right amount of flow and she is stable.

Today they are 1 week old! Beckett ate from me for his feeding! (Normally he falls asleep as soon as he is in my arms) I was so happy! To make the day even better Brad and I were able to hold Sophie for the first time tonight. It was amazing, awesome, wonderful and prefect! While we held her her heart rate went down and her breathing leveled out.

I am so thankful that they are improving and are stable! We have had so much support from our friends and family and we are so grateful for all the prayers and thoughts sent our way! Thank you!

Brad and Sophie

Me and Sophie

Sophie showing us her beautiful eyes

Our Princess

Handsome Beckett

First diaper change done by me

How Ryker spends his time when we take him to see Beckett

Us with Sophie on Sunday

Babies

Me and Beckett

Beckett

Sophie

Ready or Not pt 2

So after my melt down the anesthesiologist came in and explained how they would be giving me a spinal block and asked if I had any questions. I was still in to much shock to realize what was going on. After he left Brad gave me a blessing and told me that everything would be OK. The nurse brought in paper work for me to fill out then told me we were ready to head down to the OR. I had to get a shot in my butt to help make the babies lungs develop (that hurt like crazy). Apparently I don't have a high tolerance for pain :( They got me me ready for the spinal block, Brad had to stay back and get his cute scrubs outfit on. (I am sad I didn't get a picture of him in it (still in shock)) The nurse probably thought I was crazy cause I started counting while he stuck me in the back. I needed to get my mind off of the pain. After I was supposed to be numb for the spinal block he started the block but I wasn't all the way numb and got a nice zing down my back. (I am sick of being poked and prodded and hit with pain)

They laid me down and started to get my ready. Brad came in and sat with me. I am pretty sure everyone in the hospital was in the room while I laid there exposed to the world. Guess you can't be shy when you have a baby. Dr. Lind got right to work. I am not sure how long it took, it seemed like awhile. Around 5 pm Beckett greeted the world butt first, he had a deep cry. Sophie wanted to be like brother and also greeted the world butt first. It took her a little longer to cry. They got Beckett cleaned up a little and brought him over so I could look at him. I have never wanted to hold a baby so much in my life. He had the cutest cheeks ever! He weighed 5lbs 6 oz and was 17 in long. I only got to see Sophie for a few seconds. She weighed 5lbs 3 oz and is 18 in long. Brad left with the babies while I got sewed up. When they moved me it was weird to see my legs being moved and not being able to feel it at all.

I had to go back to my room to be watched before I could see the babies. My parents came and kept me company while I waited the hour and a half before they took me down stairs. Once down stairs I still had to wait before they could roll me into the nursery. Once I finally got in there I found out I couldn't hold them. They were both on machines that were helping them breath. I also was told that Sophie wasn't doing to hot and would be taken down to Utah Valley Hospital. (Beckett and I would be staying in American Fork) Wow was that really hard to handle and again I had another break down. I had one short sweet hour with my princess, all I could do was touch her toes. Brad gave Sophie a blessing with the help of the pediatrician. It helped calm me down and I know it helped her. They took her shortly after that. It was hard to watch her go and to know I wouldn't see her for 4 days. I also felt bad that she was going to be alone. I had Brad follow her down and stayed with Beckett for a few more minutes.

I went back to my room with my mom. She stayed till my sister came and took her to go get some things from our house. (We had nothing) My friend Amy came over and stayed with me while they went back to my house. Ryker stayed with Amy and I, he sat on the bed with me. When they checked my blood he watched the nurse very closely. He also had to have the finger monitor put on his figure too, it was cute :)

Brad came back and spent the night. As of right now Beckett is breathing on his own. The next big hurtle for him will be eating. They took Sophie off the ventilators for a few hours but it was to stressful for her so she is back on them for the next 12 to 24 hours. We are praying for both of them. I got to hold Beckett for the first time this morning it was wonderful! He has a lot of hair in the back and it has a little curl.

I love my babies and I hope that we can all be together soon. They probably won't be able to come home for another 2 to 3 weeks :( Keep them in your prayers! Pictures to come as soon as I get my camera back.

Ready or Not pt 1

On Sunday night around 7 pm I started to have some cramps and back pain. I didn't think much of it cause people cramp all the time during pregnancy and I figured my back hurt because I over did it with the house cleaning on Saturday. Well I went to bed that night had a few more cramps, not contractions. Woke up Monday decided I better call the doctor just to see what he said (I am only 34 weeks). Much to my disappointment they told me to go to labor and delivery just to check and monitor the babies. So I called Brad freaking out and crying like a crazy person (I am a little emotional :)). I showered and got ready while Brad came home from work.

We got to the hospital went up to the 3rd floor and told them why we were there. I figured we would be there for a couple hours and they would tell me to come home. We didn't have any of our stuff, I grabbed out camera just in case but thought nothing of it. Well they got me hooked up and the babies were moving like crazy (which is a good sign). The nurse decided to check to see if I was dilated. I absolutely HATE being checked! It hurts worse then contractions. Well the tiny hand nurse checked me and I was a 3. Last Tuesday at the doctors I was still closed, so apparently my cramping did something. They gave me some medicine to try and stop me from progressing. Next I needed and IV. Joy :( They let some med student, bless his heart (idiot), do my my IV. First he tells me that the place they are putting the IV is one of the most painful places to do it. (great) Well he pokes me and says my vein "rolled" (another way of saying he missed). Well he decided to go fishing for my vein. I wanted to scream. After digging with the needle in my arm for 5 minutes he decided to try again. He pokes me again and says got it.... Well actually no he didn't get it and therefor dug around in my vein again. By this point I was crying and shaking it hurt so bad. The nurse came in and said she would do it. She got my other arm ready and had it in first try no problems and very little pain. I now have a huge bruise on my arm from that stupid kid.

By now its 2 and I am starving so is Brad and I want them to just let me go home. No such luck. Brad went to get some food while I continued to sit and starve to death. They had to do a quick catheter to get a sample (that's not fun either, when you can feel everything). By 3:30 I was going to punch someone. We still hadn't heard if I was going to be able to go home or if they would just admit me. Finally at 4 the on call doctor came in and told me the medicine hadn't work. Oh and did I mention the small handed nurse checked me 2 freakin more times. By the last time Brad said I let out a few choice words while she stuck her arm inside me. (to much info) Doctor Jones told me they were going to do the c-section after I signed the papers. I was NOT ready for that! I didn't want to do a c-section I knew it was to early for the babies and to early for me. He left and I went into full freak out mode! Poor Brad had no idea what to do with me.

Summer Fun

We have had a fun and eventful summer thus far. We have been swimming, playing, having picnics up the canyon, hanging out with friends, going to parades, going to games, going to the drive-in, and just having fun. Here are some pictures of what we have been up to.

I caught him on the counter eating M&M's

Eating pizza at the drive in

Playing with the phone

He fell down and was wounded for about 15 minutes

Sitting with Grandma and Grandpa up the Canyon

Cooking Smore's with dad

Waiting for the tin foil dinners to finish (Brad, Ryker, Garrett, Erika, Lindsay, Micheal)

Mom and Me swim lessons

Big group for the 4th of July

Logan and Lorrie

Real Soccer Game (Karl, Jessica, Kiley, Tyler, Brad and Me)

Sad Cowboy

Waiting for the Parade

Swimming at Amy's